


You Were Always My First Choice

by robertstanion



Series: TGWDLM fics [5]
Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: F/M, Fluff, co written by my mate, soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2020-08-09 22:51:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20125162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robertstanion/pseuds/robertstanion
Summary: Emma Perkins, confident she'd eventually make it out in the big world one day and finally live up to her parents' expectations found herself homeless and ringing the one guy she didn't want to. Paul Matthews. Their friendship had ended due to a fight before she moved to Guatamala. She didn't expect him to pick up. Yet he did.Paul Matthews, a guy who had made success in life, occasionally thought about Emma. When she rang him, of course he'd pick up. She was his best friend.Soon Emma found herself staying at Paul's house and it was the start of a blossoming romance.





	1. Today Took A Turn For Maybe The Better, Maybe The Worst

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Eli who is the biggest paulkins fanfic fan to exist](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Eli+who+is+the+biggest+paulkins+fanfic+fan+to+exist).

> THIS. IS. BEST. BOY. WORK.  
-  
creds to Eli for helping me write this :'). Eli deserves all the credit. ILY ELI.   
-  
seriously, eli is such a good friend and we've only been friend for like a week and that was deliberately bad grammar. They are Something You Pine For(another book of mine)'s biggest fan and they're the reason I'm updating it again. We scream about Jeff Blim together. Overall, I'm doing this for you ELI.

Paul Matthews had a friend many years ago called Emma Perkins. The two, however, ended their friendship during a particularly nasty fight. This fight caused her to move away to Guatamala. He didn't know she'd since moved back. He didn't even know how her current situation was affecting her life for the worst. He didn't know she was bankrupt. He didn't know she was homeless. He didn't know anything about this. He blocked her number for a period of time, but unblocked it in hopes he'd get a message or a call one day. He may have started to catch feelings for the girl, but they quickly vanished during the fight when she expressed her true feelings. What she really felt about him was said that day, so he tried to cut her out of his life. He failed. But it was Paul's day off work. And it was on this fateful day his phone rang. He rolled his eyes and picked up his cellphone. This was no ordinary call. A familiar, yet unfamiliar name was shown on the screen. With trembling hands, he reluctantly accepted and held the phone to his ear. 

Emma, however, was in an awful state and she did know where her life would end up if she didn't take action. Multiple times had she debated calling this guy. The guy she thought was her best friend. The guy she once trusted. Until he said what he did. Then she knew she could never trust him ever again. But maybe she had to. She could see the sky turning grey and she felt more helpless than usual. All of her stuff was already soaked from the previous rainstorm they had hours ago. So she sighed as she rested her head back against the bark of the tree she was seeking shelter under and picked up the phone. She didn't have many minutes left, but she had to make this last call. So she rang his name. Paul Matthews. She was surprised he even picked up. She'd have thought he'd have blocked her after what happened. For a few seconds, she was left starstruck, unsure what to say. But then she took a breath realising it was her who had to start the conversation. 

* * *

"Hey Paul...it's Emma. I mean obviously you know it's Emma because it says my name. On your phone, I mean. Please don't hang up..." She winced. _Shit, _she thought, _what an awful start to a probably even worse decision. _"Anyways I'm calling because I...I need your help. And I know this puts you in a weird place and I'm sorry. I just don't have anyone else I can ask. Maybe calling you was a bad idea. Sorry." 

"You-you need my help?" She felt hope rise in her, hearing his voice again. "With what." He scoffed. Oh no. Paul didn't seem to be happy with her at all. "Funny. Last thing I remember is you saying you didn't need my help and you were perfectly independent. Shit! No I shouldn't have said that I'm sorry. I'm sorry uh, what do you need?" There was her Paul. Apologetic and awkward. 

"Look, I said a lot of things okay!" Her voice was bubbling with anger. _Good job, Emma. We're pushing away the last person who cared about you. Great. _"I don't...I don't have anywhere to stay right now. I got made redundant and then making rent became a struggle and then I had to take out some loans I could have never paid back, and now-now I have nothing. Is that what you want to hear Paul? You were right. I guess I do need you." She bit as anger began to seep back in. "God, I'm sorry. Please can we just talk? I'm almost out of minutes and I want to see you. Please." She wasn't this, well, emotional around anyone. Ever. But Paul was still Paul, right?

"Oh...oh okay um...um uh...where...oh god." His stutter. He lost it when he became either too confident or too....annoyed. But his stutter was a part of him. And she'd missed it. She'd missed _him. _Sure, her parents were rich, but did they ever want to help Emma? No. Because it was always about Jane. But Paul...Paul's parents were poor and he turned out a good guy. Why couldn't Emma live a normal life? A normal life where she was loved by someone just as equal. "Where abouts are you? I-I um...I'll come and pick you up if you want to talk to me..." Emma felt the glimmer of hope rise again. Maybe she'd be alright after all. She closed her eyes, taking a steadying breath. This was Paul. He was gentle and kind and protective. The man who had been her closest friend. Who had seen her go by her sister's death and still stayed by her side. She could trust him. 

"I'm at the park by the post office. The one with the kid's playground." She hesitated, as if she wanted to say something else. 

"I'll see you soon." Was the last thing he said before hanging up. At that exact time he hung up, the clouds got darker. That's when it started raining. Slowly at first, but speeding up rapidly. She was soaked to the bone in the first five minutes, and her biggest fear was yet to come true. What if Paul had lied about coming to get her? No. He wouldn't do that. He was Paul. And Paul was a _good guy_! After pocketing her phone, Emma stilled, processing the past few minutes. She had to ask herself, _did I really just do that? _ At least he didn't rub the situation she was in in her face. She pulled her threadbare jacket tighter around her, but it was no use. When a familiar car pulled up minutes later, Emma grimaced and stood up, feigning nonchalance. It had been years since they'd last spoken and she'd gone to him for help. Maybe the sense of security she once felt around Paul was still there. She watched him run towards her, the rain not bothering him. At the sight of Paul's face, his soft eyes, the familiar stance and the one bit of hair that never did what every other strand on his head did, Emma's features involuntarily softened. He held out a coat and instructed her to put it on. She pulled on the coat; it must have been this. She swallowed a lump in her throat and stared hard at the floor. "Thank you..." She muttered. "Can we...is there anywhere we can go to get out of this rain? Then we can talk. Properly. I mean...properly." He nodded. 

"I'll take you back to my place for now. I bought my car." He said, leading her to the car. He flipped a switch and Emma felt a blast of hot air in her face. She relaxed. It had been so long since she'd felt true warmth. But she sat in silence, unsure of what to say. She stared out of the window deliberately avoiding eye contact. As they neared Paul's part of town, she yawned, exhausted after days of being forced to sleep rough. And then he helped her inside. She'd have made some witty remark about being able to walk, but the way her heart fluttered whenever he held on to her forced her to act otherwise. "Uh...I'll go and get the spare room ready. For you...of course...for you..." He nodded awkwardly, running a hand through his hair. Again, the heart fluttering thing occurred. She'd either be doomed with staying with the guy she apparently liked who used to be her best friend, whether they still were was beyond her, or extremely lucky. Either way, she could still fuck her second chance up. So she'd try to do anything but that. No matter what it took, she wasn't losing Paul again. 


	2. You're The Person I Once Knew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paul and Emma stutter over their feelings for one another  
-  
PAUL POV for the majority of the chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mention of miscarriage (where i confuse eli)

He unlocked the door and ushered her inside, away from the rain. She stood there, in his coat, and he felt his heart...miss a beat. He hadn't thought he'd missed her this much, but apparently he had. "Thanks again." She began, standing by the now-closed door. "For everything. The last few days have been pretty shitty and if you hadn't answered my call...I don't even know." She said it as if she was admitting a confession. He felt his heart break. He hated seeing any of his friends upset. Like when Charlotte suffered a miscarriage and Sam and her had a particularly rough argument that night, when Bill went through his divorce, when Emma was standing in his living room sopping wet because she was homeless. He'd do anything for his friends whether he'd spoken to them 5 minutes ago or 5 years. Nothing would change. He rarely lost his temper. He was Paul Matthews and he was a good guy. "After everything I said, I'm lucky you hadn't blocked me." He felt his heart beat faster. He _had_ blocked her. She looked up. "Hey, you still have that photo of the train station!" It was a photo he refused to remove from his life. It was when him and Emma were waiting to go to uptown Hatchetfield and neither of them could catch lifts so they decided to go on the train. Bill had gone with them. The sunlight caught the two of them, making it appear as if the two were glowing gold. The two looked genuine happy and that's why he kept it up.

But hearing her talk about herself like that hurt. It hurt an awful ton. He motioned for her to sit on the couch next to him, which she did. He turned around to talk to her properly. "Yeah...yeah I still do. I still kept the photo...Uh, listen. I did block you...for a while." He confessed. He saw the pain in her eyes as he uttered the words, and his heart shattered ten times more. He hated hurting his friends. _Friends. _"And then I unblocked you!" He quickly added. "I unblocked you and debated messaging you for so long, but it was just the constant fear of if we were to fight again. So, I guess, apologies on my behalf." He hung his head in shame. Maybe if he'd have messaged her sooner, she wouldn't be in the position she was in. He could feel Emma looking at him, mouth open slightly in shock. She tilted his head upwards to face her and he saw her eyes full of concern. 

"Well, I'm in no position to fight right now." She said, truthfully. And then he noticed her eyes, glossy with tears. Tears of guilt? He couldn't tell. It was hard to read Emma. "God, I'm just so tired, Paul." She wearily added, blinking the tears away. The rain grew heavier and Paul turned around to face the window, in shock at how heavy the rain was falling. But this wasn't about the rain. This was about Emma. He turned back around. "I owe you answers, and I'm sorry to burden you like this right now, but at the minute I'm struggling to say sat up, let alone talk." She yawned to complete the sentence, punctuating it with more tears. Immediately, his protectiveness sprung back in. 

"Oh! Do you...do you want to sleep?" He asked. "I said I'd make the spare room but my room's already made from this morning and and it would be easier for you to sleep there because everything's already prepared. Of course you don't have to sleep in my room but it's just an idea I had-"

"i-yeah okay..." She said. He stood up to confirm her point, to which she grabbed his forearm. Again, his heart stopped momentarily, "This feels....this feels stupid for me to ask but do you think you have anything I could sleep in? I've been wearing these clothes for too long and I feel gross...." A small blush crept on her cheeks. It was adorable. Wait. 

"Oh! No it's not stupid I-I have old shirts somewhere. Look I'll take you up and then....tomorrow, we can go shopping and we'll get you some new clothes or whatever you want to buy okay?" He watched her hesitate and wonder if he'd said the wrong thing. 

"Alright. Lead the way then, I guess." 

He helped her up. As he did so, Emma accidentally tripped and fell on to his chest. He instinctively wrapped his arms around her, securing the two in a hug. He felt his breath shorten and his heart stop again as he realised the position they were currently in. Fuck feelings, he thought. But maybe they weren't so bad if they revolved around Emma. "Oh- um. Yeah I'll take you up now." He said, letting go of her. He saw a half smile appear on Emma's face. He helped her up the stairs in case she fell again. She didn't. But it's always better to be safe than sorry. Together, they entered his room. 

"Anything will do, I just need to get out of these clothes...."

"Yeah...yeah of course. Um..." He didn't usually stutter this much. He didn't even know where the stutter had come from. Sure, he had anxiety, but it was getting better. So why was his stutter back? He pulled out a shirt and put it on the bed. "I'm just gonna...go. Uh...have a good rest? Okay I'm going now!" He said and quickly excused himself. He walked in to the spare room after pulling out a duvet and pillow covers from the cupboard. He began making the bed, distracted severely. Emma Perkins was sleeping in his room. Emma Perkins was sleeping in his bed. That was fine. That was fine, of course it was. He definitely wasn't driving himself insane because he had a crush on Emma. Do people at the age of 30 say crush anymore? Is that the word for it? He began procrastinating again. It was fine how Emma was sleeping in his room. The part that wasn't fine was how his body was reacting to holding her so close. He shook his head and got changed, climbing under the covers. 

He'd never felt this way towards anyone before. But he was glad it was this strong towards Emma and not somebody else. He just hoped he could keep these feelings under control for as long as possible. 


	3. A Pair Of Dorks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emma likes Paul's smile and Paul's company and Paul.  
-  
EMMA POV

As the sun began shining (on thor and loki) through the curtains, Emma shielded her eyes with her arm and turned away from the light, slowly opening her eyes. She was in a house. "Wait...what the fuck?" She was in a bed. A genuine bed. And she wasn't in her own clothes. But damn this shirt was soft whoevers it was. Her plan was to steal it. Before she had time to figure out if she was still dreaming, the door burst open and Paul Matthews stood at the door. The adrenaline must have blurred her memory, because she couldn't remember anything after hitting ring. So he'd obviously picked up...and she was in his shirt and...wow. He was even more attractive than she remembered. Paul froze before shaking his head. "What are you doing here? You know I'm gonna be late I really don't have time to chat!" He laughed, grabbing his clothes. Emma pulled the covers tighter over her, now fully awake as she realised he needed to change. "Oh...uh. I'll turn around..." She slowly turned around, hearing him sigh with relief and begin changing. The temptation to watch him change was definitely there, but she didn't. "See you when you get back from work?" 

"Yeah...yeah yeah sure. Sure yeah yeah that's cool." _That damn stutter will be the death of me, _Emma thought. It was adorable and suited his personality extremely well. "Alright you can turn around now." So she did. He was flustered, attempting to tie his tie in the mirror. Emma had to resist a laugh as she pulled the covers back and walked over to him, bare foot still in the oversized shirt, the sleeve hanging off one of her shoulders. She tied his tie and sorted his collar out, leaving him frozen again, almost stunned. Almost as if he was suddenly aware this was Emma. She backed away, grinning. "I'll see you later. He snapped out of whatever trance he'd put himself in and nodded. 

"Yeah! Yeah...see you later!" He said, leaving for work. Hearing Paul's car pull away, she looked around the house, deciding to make herself a cup of coffee and find some pants. However, her first issue was that everything was far too long for her. Eventually, she settled on wrapping a blanket around herself. Her second issue was that he had, at some point, got a new coffee machine. After struggling with the buttons for far too long, she finally got it to make a clunking sound. "Guess that means it's working?" She asked herself. A few minutes after, she sat down on the couch with the old mug she used to use. "Funny..." She said, examining the mug. Every other mug in the cupboard was new...except for this one. She wondered why he'd kept this one specifically. She used to use it all the time when she came round and it soon became her favourite. It was or a mint green colour with flowers painted along the rim of the bottom of the mug. She loved it. She still did. She was actually sort of emotional that he'd kept it. Then Emma found her eyes shift to the DVD shelf. "Really Paul? DVDs? Who even owns these anymore!" She laughed softly to herself as she realised Paul was more of a dork than he'd originally let on. Regardless, she set the cup down and chose a movie to watch. She curled up on the couch and was in the same position when Paul returned hours later. 

"Are you alright?" He asked, furrowing his eyebrows slightly. He cared so deeply for her, she didn't understand why, but she was definitely grateful for it.

"Yeah, well kind of. We have a problem. Well I have a problem.." She corrected herself, gesturing to the blanket. 

He sighed. "Oh...oh you don't have any clothes!"

"Yeah. Uh, I couldn't figure out how to use your washing machine because you've upgraded every other piece of machinery since the last time I was here so I just chose a new shirt. But it's no biggie! I just need a pair of shorts or something."

"No! No no I'll go and get you new clothes if that's what you need." He said picking up his keys, lingering his eyes on her for a few seconds longer than he was supposed to. 

"Thank you. I'd like that." She smiled wryly. "In this state it's probably best if I stay here." Paul nodded.

"Yeah...yeah just um...what sizes are you?" He said, not facing her. She smiled at his awkwardness yet again. 

"6-8 usually. Is there anything I can do to help out? I guess this is a little ridiculous, given the situation, but I'm not used to being in someone's debt like this."

"No...no no I'll get there and I'll send pictures of things and you just tell me which looks good and whatever" 

"Sounds good." She smiled. "Hey! Call me when you get there?" He replied with a nod. 

"I will, don't worry." Paul returned the smile and left the household again. As the door shut on her again, Emma continuously started refreshing her messages, almost excited to see a notification from Paul when it arrived. Nothing new. She sighed as she threw her phone on the couch. As she did so, Paul messaged her. She rolled her eyes, thinking about how ironic it was. 

* * *

_Hey. I'm here do you want me to ring you? I have no clue what you'd wear. _

Emma could practically see him blushing behind the message, not that she wasn't either. She loved his awkwardness and the fact he punctuated his sentences perfectly. 

_Yeah, that seems like a good idea. _She replied almost instantly, then debated whether she replied too quickly. At the same speed, she received a new message. 

_Okay, I'll ring you. _

* * *

He said and rang her. Warmth spread through her as **_Paul _****_<3 _**appeared on the screen. "Which store are you in?" She answered with a smirk.

"Uh...I'm at Hancox's." He replied. "I have no clue what I'm doing." He admitted. She uttered a small laugh. 

"Okay, yeah I know that one I've been there a few times before. Cheap yet incredibly high quality clothing." She said with a hint of mirth. "Tell me what's in front of you and I'll guide you." 

"Clothes Emma! So many fucking clothes! Look it'd be easier if I could just turn my camera on." He said, a tone of frustration in his voice. _Typical men, _Emma thought. She laughed down the phone. 

"Video call?" He didn't reply. Instead, he hung up and rang her. She picked up. He looked flustered already and burst out laughing. "Uh Paul? You're gonna want to flip the camera around there mate." She said, continuously laughing. 

"Yes I'm working on it!" He said, his eyes going wide and he smiled in frustration. He finally flipped the camera. She loved how he turned red so easily, and struggled to refrain from further teasing. 

"So what you've got there Paul are leggings. Do you know what leggings are?" She smirked.

"Yes, Emma, I'm not that much of an idiot!" He groaned. She burst out laughing again. 

"Right, right sorry. Anyways, can you find a 6 or an S?" 

"Ugh, okay." A pause. "Yep. There's a 6 I'll get these." he said, grabbing them off the rack. 

"Good job. Now look to your left and there should be a wall of shorts? Try and find like a plain black pair."

"Emma, literally everything is solid colour-firstly why are there shorts on the wall, wall displays are for shoes. Secondly did you say good job?" Emma grinned. 

"Positive reinforcement is how my family and I taught our old dog to do tricks! Like you gave her a treat when she jumped up that kinda shit. I thought it may be useful to try it on you. Anyways just grab any pair I don't give a shit." 

"Oh my god I am not a dog!" He sighed. 

"Fair enough."

"What do you want me to get now?"

"Unfortunately for you, Paul, you're unaided shopping. I don't currently need anything else but surprise me! See you soon?" Emma waved at him over phone. 

"Emma don't you dare hang up-" But Emma did hang up, laughing to herself again. He'd never seen anyone so flustered by clothes before. 

A while after, Paul came back holding a few bags. He threw two of them at Emma. "Ouch-Paul! That hurt!" She said in mock pain. 

"You fucking deserve it. That was _hell." _ He whined. 

"I guess I do deserve it. Payback for the dog thing?"

"Correct." He sighed, slumping on to the sofa, throwing his bag on the floor. 

"Look, I really appreciate you doing this. I'm going to try and get my shit together and get a place of my own soon." She felt a twang of guilt tug at her heart as she thought about never seeing Paul again if she did move away. _No, Emma, don't be stupid, you barely know him anymore. _"Thanks." She added, grabbing the clothes and running up the stairs to avoid the awkward situation she'd placed them both in. Her heart felt heavy with guilt. When she re-emerged, she came back in jeans he'd chosen and a shirt. 

"You're not a burden, if that's what you're thinking..." Paul said. He noticed he smiled when he looked up at her. She thought back over the past 24 hours. Had it only been a day? It seemed like longer. That was the first time he'd smiled properly since they'd been in this scenario together. Emma was helpless at the sight of his smile. Paul hesitated, but suddenly blurted something out. "You can stay. You don't have to get your own place. You can...stay with me..." He said, almost eagerly. 

"Yes!" She shouted unintentionally, leaving the two staring at each other for a while. "I mean...okay. I'll help around the house and things...it's gonna be fun." She smiled at him, feeling a blush creep on to her cheeks. Then she cringed at what she just said. She sounded like a 12 year old at a sleepover. 

"It is gonna be fun." He echoed, walking over to her and punching her arm lightly. _That damn smile again. _

"So the guest room, huh? It had better be nice. I am not sleeping in a manky ass room-!" Paul rolled his eyes. 

"Only for the best for "Queen" Emma Perkins." He said sarcastically. "I'll take you up to get settled, then I'll start on dinner."

"You know I was always the queen between us two." She said before elbowing his side. "It'd be pretty nifty to be a queen. I'd get to boss everyone around! No more assholes at any coffee store! Tipping well would be my first royal decree." She said, proudly. Paul grabbed her hand and she suddenly forgot how to breathe, or to function. 

"Yes yes, tipping people well, your highness, what an excellent first decree." Paul continued the act. Emma felt the spark of electricity between them. She held tighter. 

"I am thanking you, my good sir. You could be my royal advisor! I'll knight you too! Uh, Sir Paul Matthews of Hatchetfield, New York!" Paul scoffed.

"Yeah, you're also still a fucking idiot." She wondered if he could feel the chemistry between them. She hoped so. But then again, it was unlikely he even had the same feelings nobody liked her like that. She'd continue this little act for as long as she pleased. It was keeping her entertained in a childish way, after all. 

"Hmm...Guards! Throw him in the dungeons! Wait, no...the guest dungeons!" She beamed, almost pleased with herself. "This is where you slept last night, yeah?" She asked, her heart gradually speeding up at the thought of sleeping where Paul did just hours ago. 

"Uh yeah this is where I slept last night..." Paul seemed to have lost his confidence after seeing her smile and she wondered why, but she wouldn't pry. They were standing by the doorway together, still holding hands. Emma didn't want to be the first to let go. She looked up at him, a ghost of a smile still on his face. She stood on her tiptoes, tapping his shoulders with her free hand in a mock knighting ceremony. "And that, that is to make it official." She said, softly. Then Paul slipped his hand away from hers and she felt her heart plummet. 

"Yeah right. Have a nice night Emma!" He said pushing her in the room and shutting the door quickly, as if he was panicked. 

"Weird..." Emma said to herself. She was taken aback by the sudden action, but quickly got over it. She had to rid her mind of these new thoughts of Paul. She'd never seen him this way, but god damn puberty treated him well. "Good **knight **Paul!" She joked down the hall. When he didn't reply, she couldn't help but feel mildly disappointed as she changed into another one of his shirts that she'd grabbed from his wardrobe. She climbed into the covers he once slept with. They were still crumpled from that morning. She smiled as she remembered how flustered he'd become at the thought of being late to work. "I have a crush on a dork." She yawned, shutting her eyes and drifting off to sleep. 


	4. Subtle, Yet At The Same Time, Not So Subtle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *filler chapter that Eli didn't help me write and I just took half my eye makeup off oops*  
OKAY SO BASICALLY I HEADCANON PAUL'S A MASSIVE NERD WHEN IT COMES TO LIKE GREEK GODS AND ALL THAT, SO ENTER HADESTOWN-  
-  
PAUL POV ft a shIt ton of foreshadowing, also the thing about Zoey is canon if you read the original TGWDLM script.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mention of homophobia in the singing thing, another headcanon of mine.

"Good knight!" Emma shouted down the hall. She couldn't see Paul rolling his eyes, a smile growing on his face. But the thing that bothered him was the argument they had yet to sort out between them. Emma was avoiding the conversation. He knew that for a fact. One day he'd get her to speak about it again. Hopefully some time soon and not in some ridiculous time span like seven months. (key information. See Chapter 5.) The fact she said she didn't need him hurt like hell. He couldn't fall for her until he knew the truth. 

* * *

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck Paul!" Emma shouted. 

"Yeah?" The time was 8 AM and Paul had forgotten what day it was. When Emma's life started spiralling downhill, she was fired from Beanies. They'd been living together for 3 months at this point and started to relearn each other's traits...not that Paul forgot any of Emma's. News resurfaced about a month ago that Zoey, Beanie's manager, and Sam Lowery, Charlotte's husband, were not only having an affair, but Sam was dealing Zoey drugs. Sam was fired from his job and arrested, and the same goes for Zoey leaving the position of manager opening for Beanie's. They started offering jobs around, and so far nobody had the job. So Emma came up with the wise idea that _she _should opt for the position, and Paul had been nothing but supportive. So they'd built a resume for her and Paul had it downstairs with him. Today was the day of the interview. Apparently, as soon as Zoey was fired, all her theatre friends quit too, including Nora, meaning Beanie's currently only had standby workers. They needed a manager and they needed one desperately. 

"Paul where's my fucking resume it's my interview today-if you've moved it I'm actually going to cry!" She said, running downstairs. Paul was suddenly taken aback by how beautiful she looked in a suit. But he couldn't focus on her looks. Not while she was panicking. He walked to the kitchen and grabbed the sheet off the table and walked back, tears in Emma's eyes. 

"Hey." He said, handing it out to her. She grabbed it from him and wiped her eyes carefully. 

"Is my mascara still on? Do I have mascara running down my face? Do I look okay?" Emma said, equally as flustered as he was when he went to shop for her clothes for the first time. Paul smiled and held her hands gently. 

"Emma? Listen to me okay? You are gonna nail this interview. We've had so much practise for this. Nobody has the position, and you've worked there before! So get back up, you can do it." Emma pulled herself into a hug, which took Paul by surprise. 

"Thanks Paul." She murmured, voice muffled by Paul's shirt. 

"Now, go and score yourself a job. Break a leg!"

"Never say that again!" Emma said, pulling away and flipping him off, walking out the door. 

* * *

Paul was scrolling through his Spotify recommended when a musical came up on his phone. He gagged and threw his phone across the room, repulsed by Spotify's own algorithm. "No!" He shouted, picking his phone up. "Fuck...Hadestown? Hades...wait. Spotify you bastard and a half." Paul said. He found himself listening to the first few songs. Emma, who's interview should have only lasted about an hour, was out all day. 

So when she returned, she was surprised to hear Hadestown, a musical she loved with all her heart, playing, and someone else singing. "Okay someone's broken into our house..." She said, locating the source of the singing. She was surprised to find Paul, Paul of all people, sitting on his laptop singing along to some of the words. She smiled waiting for him to look up.

He felt someone's eyes on him and looked up and saw Emma. He switched the music off. "So. The guy who doesn't like musicals listening to Hadestown huh?"

"Shut up."

"You didn't seem like the type."

"Shut up."

"The guy who doesn't like musicals listening to Hadestown, a musical about Greek Mythology. And you, you of all people, have an amazing singing voice did you realise?!" 

"Can you drop it, Emma?"

"No, Paul! That was incredible!" She said, sitting next to him. "I didn't know you could sing like _that!" _

"Emma!" He snapped, and she jumped back slightly. 

"Um...yeah?"

"Please just drop it for fucks sakes I've asked you, it's clear I don't want to talk about it just drop the fucking subject drop the fucking subject!" He shouted, slamming his laptop on the table and storming upstairs. Emma'd never seen Paul that....upset before. She had to make this right. She had to make this right....

* * *

Paul was sat in his room on the side of his bed, trying not to remember the memories that triggered his love for musical theatre to fade. When he auditioned for whatever musical they did back in Sycamore, and got homophobic comments thrown at him left and right. Even with the chaotic amounts of days off school he had off, he still passed with flying grades. He sang whenever he could when Emma was away, because he loved to sing. And the fact there was a musical about one of his main passions, Greek Mythology, had bought his confidence back up. He wasn't ready for anyone else to hear him sing. Then there was a knock at the door and Paul sighed. 

"Paul...please I-I'm sorry I just...I don't know where I'm going with this. But I just wanna talk to you about this. I didn't mean to upset you...Can I come in?" He couldn't stay mad at her. 

"If you want." He replied, running a hand through his hair as the door clicked open. Emma sat next to him. "I'm sorry I-I shouldn't have freaked out like that over you. It's just...the last time someone heard me singing a musical I got...homophobic comments back at me."

"And that was?"

"When I was 16. Back at Sycamore. I was Sycamore's lead male for everything. Then these new kids came along and bullied me to the extent I skipped any class I had with them, skyved off a lot and uh...still passed with flying grades landing me a job at CCRP."

"Oh- Paul I had no idea...I'm so sorry is...is that why you went through that one phase when we were 16? When you wouldn't form proper sentences." Paul nodded. 

"That's the time." Emma pulled him into a hug. "But Hadestown is...pretty good."

"It is, isn't it?"

"Couldn't Orpheus hear Eurydice or am I misunderstanding the plot?"

"I won't say a word."

"You bastard." Paul said, punching her lightly. 

"Anyways, I got the job." She said casually. 

"You got it?"

"Yeah. I had a mental breakdown before I went in but I'm manager at Beanie's now!" She smiled. 

"Proud of you, dumbass."

"Proud of you for singing again, even bigger dumbass!"


	5. Four Months After Chapter 4, This Is A Homewreck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SeVen mOnThs AFtER cHapterS OnE tHroUgH tHReE, Paul confronts Emma finally about the argument they had so long ago.   
-  
EMMA POV

Emma was rereading the notes for some new employees she was thinking of hiring when she noticed Paul standing against the wall by the stairs. It had been seven months since Emma had moved in with Paul and they'd had their ups and downs. The thing she dreaded was when he decided he wanted to talk about the argument. You could only avoid something for so long until it catches up with you. "Em?" Paul asked, breaking the silence. 

"Hm?" Emma asked, looking up from the notes she had. 

"Did you really mean it when..."

"When what, Paul?"

"When you said you didn't need me? During our fight...when you said all that shit about me...did you mean it?" Fuck. She was fucked. 

"I don't want to talk about it Paul." She sighed, her voice flat. Even the mention of the fight had began to rile her up. 

"Did you mean it? Yes or no? Give me an answer and I'll never bring it up again." So Paul was being persistent about this. 

"It's not as simple as that. I didn't want to talk about it. But fine, since you're clearly so desperate to know, let me explain something," she began hotly. It had been a long day, exacerbated by the heat of mid-summer, and she didn't have time for this. Paul went to speak up but she silenced him. "You were being overbearing. Full stop. You kept pushing myself to be "honest with myself," whatever the fuck _that_ means, about my family. And then you had the audacity to suggest that if I just "put some effort in" my life, I wouldn't have been in a minimum wage job in my 30s. I didn't need you. I didn't need your concern, or your unsolicited advice. I knew I had gone wrong _somewhere in my life_, okay, I knew. But when I finally began to trust you, you took it as an invitation to micromanage my life with your shitty ideas!" She stood up, throwing the papers besides her and took a step closer to him, finally unbottling all the hidden rage she'd had contained for years at this point. Not just for Paul, but for everyone who had hurt her. Everyone who had made her feel worthless, incapable of doing things. "So yeah, I left. I left Hatchetfield to get away from _you _because I needed to prove to you that I didn't need your help. I didn't need anybody's help! That I didn't need to rely on someone. But you know what Paul? After all that, it turns out I _did _need you. Happy? I ended up in a park, in the rain, clothes that barely fit me with an aching back from the days I'd spent sleeping on the ground and a phone with damn near no credit left. So no, I didn't mean it. Clearly, I do need you!" She said taking another step towards him, tears threatened to spill. 

"Okay" Okay Jesus I'm sorry for asking!" He spat. Oh no. The stutter was gone. "Now it's your turn. You ask me anything you want. Anything in the universe you can ask me and I will give an honest answer seeing as I'm the only honest one between us!"

"What a pathetic lie!" She screamed. "I was as honest as I'd ever been with anyone around me! But you want a question I'll give you one!" As the full force of what this was turning in to hit her, she crumbled for a split second, a tear falling. No going back now. "Do you still want me in your house..." She said softly, not wanting to fight. It was too hot, she was tired, and she hated fighting. She wanted all of it to stop. Paul took a deep breathe. She heard it and saw it. And that was the scary thing. She couldn't read him right now, and it was _really fucking scary. _

_"_I'm going to be entirely honest with you here. I don't know." Shit. That wasn't a good start. "For ages I went with questions unanswered, and now I know what I've wanted to know, I don't actually think I can look at you the same. I know I messed up as soon as I said what I did, but you wouldn't listen when I tried to apologise. It was a hot day, like today, and I wasn't in the right mind to fight, hence why I tried to hurt you the most. But I never wanted it to get any bigger than what it already had." That's when he took a step towards her. "Maybe I do still want you around. Maybe I don't. But I think after this, I don't think we'll be as close as we used to be." Fuck. This wasn't what she wanted. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. How to make this right? Agree with him? No. Because she didn't. _Start with an apology, Emma,_ she thought to herself.

"Sorry I don't-" She balled her hands into fists and continued holding back the tears. She took the remainder of the steps between them, closing the gap entirely. "I didn't mean that..." She should say more, but her voice was quivering and she didn't want Paul to know she'd cry over some stupid fight like this. Because she definitely hadn't cried the day their massive fight happened either. Nope. She was Emma Perkins and she was strong. She never cried. 

"You didn't mean what, Emma. I don't understand." His tone was bitter. She didn't like this side of Paul. 

"Any of it I just...you've been so kind and I've been the worst. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you..." She reached up and cupped his face gently, her eyes teary still. She saw his eyes soften as soon as she cupped his face. And then he put his hands on her shoulders and she felt herself melt at his touch. This man would be the death of her. She wouldn't be able to contain her feelings for him for much longer if he continued this fucking act of his. 

"I've been the worst too. I treated you like utter shit and it's my fault you left. You needed someone and I kicked you out. But obviously I wouldn't do that again. I won't do it again." Now Paul was being ridiculous. He hadn't done anything wrong, really. She got scared and left. She shook her head and she shut him up. She grabbed his tie with her free hand and pulled him down to her level and kissed him. 

* * *

**MINI PAUL POV:**

After everything, his head was spinning. His pining for Emma was too strong by now and she was so close to him and his heart was beating too quick. He was so light headed, he was surprised he was still standing. And then she cupped his face and he softened instantly. That was the thing with Emma. He couldn't stay mad at her. _He loved her. _And then she grabbed his tie and pulled him down to her level, and then she was kissing him. He felt his heart stop and his eyes widened as he realised what was happening. Emma was kissing him. _EMMA WAS KISSING HIM! _He was like a fangirl right now, his mind thinking a million things at once. After the realisation set in, he kissed back as softly as he could. He didn't believe this. He had to be dreaming. 

* * *

**BACK TO EMMA, POV:**

She released the two of them, catching her breathe and clearing her throat, swept through a whirlwind of emotions. She wiped her tears before Paul noticed she was crying. "Sorry I...I should have asked..." Paul, however, was stunned to the spot, unable to move. He shook his head, shaking himself out of a trance.

"I-no no Emma I-" He sighed and looked at her. "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" Electricity was all around the air between them as she looked up at him, smiling again. 

"Okay."

"Yeah?" He asked, almost shocked at her answer. 

"Yeah, you dumbass. Took you long enough. Do you forgive me?" And then Paul smiled. His smile...wow. 

"I guess I can forgive you." He paused and the smile faded. "Hang on. What do you mean by, took me long enough?" 

"I've been living with you, platonically, for seven months." She rolled her eyes, holding back a cheesy grin. Paul laughed lightly, picking her up as she uttered a squeal. 

"I guess you were right, my queen."

"Thank you, my Prince Consort." She giggled. "And steed! I hope you're taking me to my new quarters! I want to purvey the land!" She declared in a posh British accent (fun fact, when Eli wrote that part, she wrote "declared in a southern accent" and had to put in stage directions **Southern English sksksk like London not Texan **so press F in the chat that we didn't get a rootin-tootin yeehaw cowgirl Emma.) 

"Oh shut up it's not too late to dump your ass." Paul said, kissing her cheek and carrying her upstairs. 

"As if you could." She grinned, burying her face in his chest. 

"Yeah. Yeah right. I'm not afraid to drop you either." Emma yelped as he said that, as he let go of her for a split second and she fell a tiny bit. She clung on tighter. 

"NO! It's such a long way to fall! If I end up in hospital you're paying!" She said, shaking slightly. 

"Or am I?" Paul laughed, opening his bedroom door. _Their _bedroom door. "Lets agree to never bring up the fight ever again."

"Yeah, I'd like that. A fresh start." She said, gracelessly dropping on to the floor. "And in return, I promise to never return any of your shirts. Deal?"

"How many have you stolen, Em?" Paul sighed. 

"Uhhh...let's see. 5? No. 6. Not above 8! Okay maybe I should give back one or two..."

"We haven't even been dating for 10 minutes, em." He laughed. 

"But it's already come with loads of perks! Like, I never would have told you about my stash of your clothes if we weren't dating! Really, I think you should be thanking me." She added, playfully. Paul laughed a genuine laugh. The laugh she'd never get tired of hearing. 

"Sure. You'd have to of told me at some point." Emma raised a brow. 

"You're not calling in to question my hiding techniques, are you?"

"Not at all. Why are you on the floor?"

"Because then I can pretend that the only reason I'm lower than you is because I'm sat. Not because you're like 6"1 or whatever."

"6 and a half feet." He laughed. "And anyways, I believe you had a very nice journey up the stairs." Emma shook her head, smiling. This was home now. 


End file.
